I’ve been thinking a lot about the miraculous world. Feeling into and being grateful for the wild threads and moments when a little something numinous comes in and reminds me that the world is so much bigger and more wondrous than I can imagine.
When I was in my 20s, this feeling was very present. It would come in strong and give me marching orders on what was the next step. For example, when I was a secretary in a psychiatrist’s office at 21, a woman walked in for her appointment and I felt as though the whole room shook and lit up. Later, the psychiatrist said it was just my mother issues but that same woman would later hire me to work on a Museum of World Religions project where I got to travel to Taiwan and be with Buddhist nuns -- even though I was essentially a college drop-out at the time.
Then things got quiet for a few years. I blamed Harvard for a bit. That I’d worked too hard to be a rational person. That I’d gotten too heady or over-thinky. I remember asking someone during that time, “How do you make decisions without your intuition, without marching orders from something bigger?” And they described how you just write down all the pros and cons and then see which is the longer list. It seemed very inefficient!
For the last few years, this feeling is back. Maybe it’s being with Erik, who listens to my dreams and my nudges. He’s hot for efficiency and finds my intuitions the quickest route to whatever our current decision is. Maybe it’s being closer to nature or having more quiet time or studying with teachers who remind me over and over that the world is larger and more wondrous than I can know. I don’t know. But I’m grateful.
If you're called to, I'd love for you to get in touch and tell me something wondrous, something miraculous, big or small. Some moment when you knew something or the light came in. I want to form a little circle of the numinous, a space outside of the idea of coincidence and play in the world of serendipity, following the threads of something bigger and mysterious. Tell me something!
And if you want to enter this space together, come join me for a Soul Dive. Here's the link: https://ameliaperkins.ck.page/products/soul-dive-session.
I remember one of the first times I encountered the numinous. I came out of a psychology class at UC Santa Cruz when I was 20, walked through the heavenly redwood forest of the campus. We had discussed mystical experiences and the sense of the numinous in the class. I stopped on a footbridge and took in the majesty of the redwood canyon in front of me; really stopped and let it in. And everything slowed down and everything glowed, became... numinous. Its a beautiful comfortable place and I am grateful for when numinosity blesses me. Here's to those magical moments, sweet medicine as Native people say, that remind us that life is meant to be this way.